If you have an Xbox 360 that you bought with every intention to replace basic cable then you are not alone, well not alone among other single guys. Here are 5 ways your affection for your Xbox and your girlfriend can Co-Exist.
#5 – Designate time for your Xbox – Got your gaming rocker chair complete with cup holder and bedpan ready for the all day Call of Duty 4 mash-up? Only when you’re single. Maybe you don’t have a girlfriend that lives with you (per se) but a girlfriend none-the-less. So when you tell her you can’t hang because you got a date with virtual reality, you won’t have a girlfriend for long. But not to worry, girlfriends will 9 times out of 10 understand that we need to kick a little kids ass on Live once in a while. It keeps us sane. You will appreciate your gaming time more when you play sparingly. And if your girlfriend doesn’t understand, then she’s not a good girlfriend in my opinion. Leet geek forever!
#4 – Play a game with a Story – Some of my favorite games have a long involved story behind it, with action, drama, puzzles, and beautiful scenery. Why you ask? Because my wife loves them too. Truly, girlfriends would rather shove wood splinters under their finger nails then watch you play madden all day, but games with a storyline trigger the part of their brains that make them ask you, “Why did that guy kill your cousin? He’s such an asshole”, or “Don’t go that way, go this way?” or “If a mob boss tried to kill me would you kick his ass, baby?”. You know? That same annoying thing they do while watching a movie you’ve never seen, but they ask you questions anyway? Hey, at least you get to play your game right?
#3 – When she wants to play, Let her – I know, I know. Your game score is like a measurement of your penis, but not to worry because with in 2 minutes she’s going to grab the control, run into a few walls, get killed and hand back your manhood out of frustration anyway. And it’s kind of entertaining to watch. Enjoy.
#2 – Shop on your Xbox -You and your girl went to Gamestop and you bought a brand new Xbox Elite complete with the 100GB HD and your copy of Halo, and she’s pissed because she’s been hinting you into taking her to couples massage. Well, now you’re Xbox is in danger of your sweet lover taking a hammer to it when she dumps your ass. Just kidding. You shouldn’t date girls like that anyway. What you should do is spend the extra dough on gamer points to rent movies right off the xbox. It’s convenient and as an extra bonus, let her pick the movie. Yeah. Sit through the Bride Wars and Sex in the City, because she earned it. Plus there’s tons of arcade games the both of you can enjoy in the marketplace, so buy one or two and bond over some Bust-a-Move.
#1 – Take your Girlfriend out already – I mean, come ON! Spending over $300 on video game equipment doesn’t exactly say, “I’m outgoing”. So take your girl out more than you spend on more video games. Get a gamefly subscription and save the $50 or $60 on games that you know have a lot of replay value. Get that couples massage she’s been hinting at every week, and take her out to a nightclub or somewhere that gives her an excuse to get all done up for you. Trust me, it’s worth taking time away from gaming when she’s polished up and smelling good for you.
So game-on gamers, and enjoy the Feng Shui of your girlfriend and XBOX living together in harmony. And don’t forget to add me on XBOX.