For years I have been observing the games people play in relationships regardless of their nature; marriage, failing relationship, new relationship, platonic relationships and romantic relationships. Before I continue however I have to admit that I have played a few myself and have been the recipient of many during my adult years.
Exactly want are relationship games? They are generally manipulative tactics to achieve;
In the world of sports almost every event from playing tennis to ping pong involves a competition which almost always implies a winner and a loser. Relationship games are no different. There is usually a competition for;
Attention from the other person
Getting even with them for some reason
Punishing them for some unexpressed motive
Many game players are passive aggressive while others are just insecure. But most let their ego rule their behavior and ultimate outcomes. In the end all game playing wastes energy, time, resources and causes emotional pain of some kind.
There are too many types of relationship games to begin to even list even the more common ones. I can tell you that if you are a game player you know who you are and if you are on the other end of any relationship games you most likely know it or should by now.
Playing games implies that people are generally not dealing in the truth or have some need to unconsciously hurt the other person. So, why do people need to play games in their relationships?
If you are a long-time subscriber to my weekly tips you have learned by now that I generally don’t offer answers to many of the questions I pose or the topics that I share with you. You know that my intent is not to tell you what to do or how to do it but only to ask you to think about the topic covered relative to your attitudes, feelings or behaviors. This one is no different so here are a few questions to consider.
1. Are you in a relationship (and I don’t care how long it has lasted) where game playing is prevalent?
2.Are you a game player in your relationship or is it your partner or are both of you guilty?
3.When you play a game and you win, is the short and long-term price worth it?
4. When you get involved in a game and you lose, how does it make you feel about yourself, your partner and your relationship?
5.Do other people you know see the games that are being played in your relationship but neither you or your partner seem to be aware of them?
6.If there is a lot of game playing in your relationship who tends to start them most often? Who is the loser most often?
Now it’s time for you to do a little work.